Sometimes it is hard being a parent

It;s just hard. Like when you wake up for the second morning in a row after seeing every hour of the clock with your little girl who has been sick. It's hard when that same morning that you are so sleep deprived you have every wish in the world to just climb back into bed and go into work late. It's hard when that same morning, you begin to get both kids ready, and they want to challenge and battle every little thing you say or try to get them to do. From temper tantrums, grunts, meltdowns as they throw themselves to the ground, or throw a toy at you. They don't like what they are wearing, Jonna doesn't want her hair put up. Ben doesn't like his shorts. Jonna hates that I put the lid on the cup and didn't let her. Ben doesn't want to wear socks, and he is cold. Jonna thought it would be a good idea to sneak away to Mom's room and plaster mascara all over her face and dress. Ben thinks he needs a peice of candy for breakfast before his actual breakfast. Ben wants his Dad cuz he is at work and Mom finally has had it and says, "GET IN THE VAN OR I AM LEAVING WITH OUT YOU!"

It's hard when you think you deserve more recognition. It's hard when you don't know what end is up, what end is down, where you are going, where you are coming from. What should you make for dinner? Do I have enough time to stop at the store on lunch, or clean out the van that has crackers, orange peels, tissues, cups, blankets, toys, crumbs, all over the place? What should I do next? Running in circles all the time. Sometimes, I remind myself to stop and BREATHE!! I can't even remember the last time I was able to pick up a book and read. Oh, how I love to read.

Lets' get down to business. Slow down, and just stop thinking in fast forward. The real truth is it's all so worth it. Really, who would I have enjoyed my mother's day with and went on a walk with accross the river bridge on Mother's Day while Jake was working. My kids.

As we headed home from Gma's house on sunday, I drove over the bridge as I do almost every day and saw the new bridge walk way, where all the families were taking a peacefull stroll admiring the river. So, what did we do? Mama parked the car, and said lets have an adventure! I wasn't sure what to expect, but this was it.


Almost to the top! I really thought I would be carrying Jonna a lot. It was the end of the day around 6pm, and they had both had their fill of playing. But nope, they both trekked away.


Did I mention how terrified I felt walking on this bridge while Jonna and Ben both felt the need to put their fingers underneath the fence and wiggle around admiring the huge river several hundred feet below. I think I have a small fear of heights. I wanted to stay RIGHT in the center of this walkway. Not my children. They felt the need to walk right next to the side of the fence that faced the river making sure to stop and lean into the fence to get a real good look.


Breaktime on the way down.

Seriously with two sweet kids like this that take a break to come give me a hug and say they Love me all the time. I mean me. Their Mom that sometimes forgets Ben's bookbag, or Jonna's diaper wipes for daycare. Oh, or did I mention when I pulled Jonna's elbow out of socket trying to keep her from falling down the stairs.
I would be lying if I didn't tell you how completely overwhelmed I feel sometimes. Even feeling like I fail as a parent, yes, those are the times, when I ask, "What am I doing wrong?!" or More so, "What can I do better?!"

Every day is in a adventure, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Okay, I am lying. I wouldn't mind a full nights' sleep. Sometimes, it is a little hard being a parent.